One more post for the night.. (video game related)

(That’s Right, three posts before I even have the domain set up!)

If you ever want to see someone completely lost, give them something similar to what they’re familiar with, then change just enough so they are flailing around like crazy.

Here’s an example.

I play the most popular MMO out there, World of Warcraft. Currently, I have two main characters, a Human Paladin (named Lailana), and a Pandaren Monk (Arondan).

What’s a pandaren? Well, they’re basically, walking talking pandas for those of you who haven’t played the game (and please, don’t start. It’s a horrible horrible addiction that will suck up all your free times. However, if you DO start, send me your BattleTag, and we’ll be addicts together!)

Wait, went off topic there.

I’m focusing this story on Arondan. He fufills the Damage Per Second (DPS, pronounced Deeps) role on a team. He does ok. I can raid normal, but heroic’s a bit of a stretch to me, and the top level (mythic), I’d be more Panda Express(ly Dead) then Pandaren, so I don’t even try.

Despite there’s 3 DPS, one tank, and one healer in your typical five man dungeon group (roughly the same ratio in Large Raid Groups, although there’s only two tanks and 4 healers in your typical 15 man group), there’s usually more then 3x as many DPS looking for groups as there are healers and tanks. So, while healers and tanks go to the front of the line (and sometimes when they REALLY need Tanks/Healers, there are official Blizzard sponsored character bribes to get you to queue up as a tank or a healer), DPS are stuck waiting in the queue for the healers and tanks show up.

I guess a good analogy is the club where all the FUN stuff happens. Can you take a beating and come back for more?


Can you heal your group and keep them alive, no matter what? (and trust me, speaking as a healer, there’s usually a LOT of room in no matter what for other people’s mistakes.)


Can you kick royal booty and burn things down like a madman?

GET BACK IN LINE, PLEB. You Are #2154 of 2154 waiting. Estimated Wait Time: Heat Death of the Universe.

So, I decided to try a second role with Arondan, that of healer.  That way I get more stuff, and don’t have to waste all my time waiting for queues to pop.

Hoo boy. How can I put this politely?

Um.. comparing my proficiency with the Monk DPS spec to my attempts with the Healing Spec is like comparing a supermodel to a department store mannequin.

They look the same from a distance, but yeah, you notice the difference very quickly.

In DPS, it’s like “Ok, so I have my rotation down, Jab twice, then Tiger Strike, then Black Out Kick, back to Jab, then Fists of Fury.. then..”

Healing it’s like “Ok what does that button do? Ok.. ok.. I think I got this.. wait burst damage. PRESS ALL THE BUTTONS WHY IS THIS NOT WORKING AAAAAHHHHH!!”

Needless to say, it wasn’t a success. Thankfully, it was just the Proving Grounds, with AI Bots, not real players whose character repair bills I’d probably have to pay after they kicked me out of the group with “GTFO NOOB PLEB!”

But yeah, it was kinda amusing in a trainwreck kinda way to go from the knowledge I’ve learned by DPS to flailing away hitting button and then just closing my eyes and shaking my head as my virtual pals died a horrible death yet again.

The reason for that? I’ve spent 100 levels (god, that sounds like half of forever, I don’t want to check how long I’ve played Arondan) building my knowledge up of how to play him as DPS. I know all the tricks, and each new thing has been thrown at me several levels after the one before, so I have time to get used to how the character’s abilities interface with each other. Trying to learn 100 levels of healing abilities at one go is like trying to fill a gallon jug with a spoon.

(oh, and Lailana? She’s my healer. I’ve gotten pretty good with her, I can even do heroics with her. But she’s a paladin and not a monk. Although I’m sure my efforts to be a Pally DPS or Tank would be just as bad/humorous/futile if I tried)

So in short, if you haven’t started playing WoW, you’re probably better off, but if you do start, A) Let me know, so we can play together, and B) Don’t worry if you’re horrible. We’re all horrible.